Monday, November 30, 2009

Poor Tristan

She's always sick! She didn't come over yesterday to decorate the tree because she wasn't feeling well and now she's out of school today. The girl has allergies but won't take her medicine so she ends up getting sick a lot! Her ears hurt and she has a headache so it's probably a sinus infection. John's going to run by to see her tonight and make sure she's ok.

Only two days until I test! I know I ovulated on the wrong side, early and my lining was thin but I can still be hopeful right? Since I had the hcg shot, too my disdain, I can't test early. I would run the risk of a false positive and that would just be HORRIBLE! I can't imagine getting super excited and thinking you're pregnant but you're not. So I'm waiting the recommended amount of time. I am at peace this month even if it's negative because we have a plan. You know how I love a plan.


Sunday, November 29, 2009

Pics from Thanksgiving

We had a great Thanksgiving weekend. Thursday we went down to my Aunt Pam's house with my Dad's family. Friday I did a little early morning shopping and then we both had to work until about 2. Then we watched the Alabama game which almost ruined our whole weekend! Thankfully the Tide pulled out a victory in the last few minutes of the game. Whew! Saturday John worked on the door and I babysat Emma for 3 whole hours! Jess usually comes back after about an hour but I told her that would be unacceptable this time! I wish I had taken my camera because she was so sweet and funny the whole time! She even took an hour and a half nap while I held and rocked her. ahhhh perfect day! I also made a big pot of chili since it's been chilly this weekend... yes Canadian family, it's been cold. Friday morning it was 1 degree celcius when I went shopping and that's cold in my book!! :o) Today I'm cleaning house and John's still working on the door. I'll post pictures when he's done because he's been working hard! He even slept in the floor of the living room last night with a golf club for protection because the stain was wet and he couldn't put the handle back on the door. That's dedication! We're also getting Tristan this afternoon. John's going to get her at around 3 so she can come over and help decorate the tree. It's one of my favorite traditions and I couldn't imagine doing it without her!

If you're wondering where I am in my cycle I am 9 dpo. That means I can test Wednesday and if it's negative stop taking the progesterone so Mother Nature should come calling Friday or Saturday. Then I can start my next and "last cycle" of injectables. I put last cycle in quotation marks because we've been saying last cycle for months! But I'm 90% sure this time if it doesn't work that we'll do IVF in January.

First is a picture of my Nana and her five children. Left to right, back then front is Johnny, Jerry (my dad), Jimmy, Jackie, my Nana, and Pam.

This is my Dad, my mom, Julie and me. My brother had already left so we couldn't make it of the whole fam.
This is me and my Nana

And finally this is one of the kids jumping on the trampoline. There's Katelyn, Austin, Marla and Brylan.

Somehow John managed to dodge all of the picture taking this year. I'll have to make sure I get him at Christmas!


Friday, November 27, 2009

Roll Tide!!

If you haven't visited the great state of Alabama during Iron Bowl week you should...especially the day of Iron Bowl! I jumped up this morning at the crack of dawn to do a little shopping before heading into work. It just so happens that this year Iron Bowl falls on Black Friday so I didn't have to think of what to wear. It's ingrained into you from childhood that this day you will wear your team colors. I got to Target and tried to look at everyone from an outsider's perspective. The parking lot was full of cars with Alabama or Auburn flags! It was amazing to see almost every person wearing red or orange... mostly red :) I, of course, have on my Alabama long sleeve T-shirt. Strangers were passing each other with a nod and a "Roll Tide". It's wonderful to see this day bring so many people together even it is for a less than friendly goal... to beat the mess out of Auburn! The Auburn fans did the same for each other but I don't even speak they're cheer; much less type it. So if you're not from Alabama you'll just have to google that Barn school's cheer or you can say Roll Tide all day with me!


Thursday, November 26, 2009

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving! Today I am thankful for my health! One of the girls who sits by me at work found out she had strep Tuesday. Yesterday my throat was a bit scratchy so I feared I would get it too. But today my throat is fine and I am fever free! Whew! Now I get to go see my family and play with some babies! Hope you all have a safe Thanksgiving Day with lots of love and great food!


Wednesday, November 25, 2009


I have so many blessings in my life that they're hard to count. I have a wonderful husband, beautiful stepdaughter, sweet lil pup, supportive family, fabulous friends, nice house, a comfy bed to sleep in, food in my belly.... yes life is good! I am even thankful for the job I have for as long as I get to have it. They could have easily fired us all on the spot and hired temps at a cheaper rate. Instead they gave us almost a year notice and the promise of 4 months severance. I can't say I'm happy to lose my job in January but I am blessed for the way it is occurring. This Thanksgiving Holiday I am thankful for all of the above as well as the hope that one more blessing will happen soon... a sweet little angel of my own!

We're going to my Aunt Pam's house tomorrow for my Dad's annual family Thanksgiving dinner. There are about 30-35 of us who attend so it's usually an eventful day.

Your very blessed friend,

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Better Days Ahead

Thanks for letting me be sad yesterday and for all of the love and support. The actual day she was due was Nov 18th, 2008. For days I was pushing down my emotions but they kept coming back. So I finally decided to give myself a day yesterday to just wallow in my heartache. I cried just about all day which is hard to do when you're sitting in a room with 8 other people. Luckily I sit with my back to them so no one knew. However, by last night I was giggling on the couch with my husband watching How I Met Your Mother. I just needed to let myself feel it so that I could move past it.

In the spirit of some other fabulous ladies I know who blog, I'm going to mention the gifts in my life I'm thankful for this Thanksgiving week. Today I am grateful for my compassionate husband and How I Met Your Mother... One of the funniest shows ever! Last night's episode was "Slapsgiving 2" which is a sequel to last year's "Slapsgiving". It was by far one of the funniest episodes and John and Tristan actually play slapsgiving now all year long. I can't tell you how thrilled I was that last night was a sequel to that episode. God works in mysterious ways! Only He would know a silly TV show could pull me out of my funk.


Monday, November 23, 2009

Somber Day

I know I usually try to keep the mood light and funny for my posts but today I couldn't. Sorry for the sadness but it's my mood today. Tomorrow will be a better day!

A poem for my baby girl
There is not much happiness in my world today
I wish you were here to celebrate your 1st Birthday

You should be eating cake and making a mess
Instead I’m stuck here with this terrible sadness

You should be learning to walk while I hold your hand
You should be able to smile, speak and stand.

Every night I would rub my belly, talk to you and pray
That God would let me keep you just one more day

How selfish I was not to want to let you go
I still wish I could have had you in my arms to hold

Although I may be sad that you are not here
I know that God had a different path to steer

The three weeks we shared together were like no other
I can’t tell you how grateful I am you made me a mother

Though you were only with me a few short weeks of time
I loved you every minute, every second you were mine


Sunday, November 22, 2009


The past three months of follistim have not been too bad. I can say maybe I was a touch more emotional or sensitive but I didn't think I was especially moody... however, John may not agree :) But this month they upped my dosage a tiny bit and WHOA my hormones are raging! I am easily irritated, easily angered and cry at everything. I can't imagine how I will be if I have to do IVF. They really crank up the injections for that! Pray for John!

Here are some pictures from Tristan's Greek Day. John was so cute when I asked how it went. He bragged like such a proud dad.


Friday, November 20, 2009

A Big Fat Thank You

I just want to give a Big Fat Thank You to Mom and Dad Z for coming down and tiling our floor. Every morning I wake up and walk downstairs it reminds me of them and how much we miss them already!

Tristan has her Greek Day presentation today. John is going this morning and taking pictures so I'll post them this weekend. She is dressed in her beautiful gown and jewelry, armed with pictures from her Uncle Chris's trip to Greece and Greek cookies her Yia Yia made. She most definitely will be the best presentation!

Update on my mom - It looks like her gallbladder is clear. She had some inflammation in her tummy so they think it may be acid reflux... maybe that's who I got it from!

Update on my soulcyster, Kathleen. This was her post this morning: Just got back from the NT scan. All clear! 1 in 7950 chance of Down Syndrome and 1 in 10,000 chance of Trisomy 13 or 18. That's very good!! The baby looked good, lots of wiggling around and moving his/her arms and legs. I'm so relieved. This is the stage when my last pregnancy ended, so now I'm about to embark on new territory.
What a miracle! I hope I get mine soon!


Thursday, November 19, 2009

Don't you hate it when....

Don't you just hate it when you know more than the nurses?!? UGH! For my next career maybe I should be a nurse at a Fertility Specialist. I started having my usual ovulation symptoms yesterday but the problem is I was only on CD 8! AND of course I was hurting on the left side. So I called the nurse line and I gave her the spill about how they're supposed to catch me before I ovulate so they can stop it and the right side can catch up. She said... I quote "We can't control which side you ovulate on" in her nastiest tone. To which I replied, "Oh yes you can! You just have to catch my follicles between 1.2cm and 1.5cm which is really difficult." She said for me just to come in at my appt time today. I didn't feel like arguing and I figured if I was already having symptoms that I was close to maturity and it was too late. Guess who was right?? I had a 1.9cm this morning on the left as well as two 1.3's. I also had a lonely 1.2 on the right. She was flabbergasted! We're all so frustrated! Why is my body ovulating so early this month? Last month it was Day 16! I'm a whole 8 days early! GRR! Then she said the magic words "Can we try one more cycle?" She said it seems every month we say one more cycle but what she really means is one more cycle on the right side. Since I'm so early we will be able to squeeze in one more cycle before January. January is when we want to do IVF because of John's flex plan. So... one more cycle it is!

It's going to be close with the insurance though. We were told yesterday that we are pretty sure to have a job until Dec 31st. After that they will start laying people off. They want the whole deal done by Jan 31st now! SO - If I get laid off in Jan my insurance will only go through Jan 31st. Uh oh! I won't start IVF until probably the second week in January which means it will be done in February. I'll be switching insurances in the middle of the cycle and I'm not sure if John's insurance covers any of the monitoring. Decisions. Decisions.

I hope this Thursday is working out better for you than it is for me!


Wednesday, November 18, 2009


Rachel - This post is for you!! Pictures only.

1. Our new floor! Isn't it lovely!
2. John working hard3. Papou, Tristan and Yia Yia standing on the new floor.

4. The old floor
5. The outfit Yia Yia made for Tristan's Greek Day at school on Friday!

6. Walking Lexi

7. Emma and me on Halloween.


Monday, November 16, 2009

Time Flies

These past nine days have flown by! We have to say goodbye to Mom and Dad Z tomorrow morning. Their flight leaves out at 8 am. We have thoroughly enjoyed their visit and hope they will come back soon!

The floor is done and looks great! I took some pictures of it last night and will try to post either tonight or tomorrow. It's amazing how it completed the kitchen!

I'm thinking of my mom today as she is having some tests for her upset tummy. You may remember she was hospitalized not too long ago for it. They never really found out what was wrong so today they're doing an ultrasound on her gallbladder and then putting her under and running a tube down into her stomach.
She and my Dad came by for a little while yesterday. It was nice to see the families get together. They're completely different but somehow it works!

Fertility news - I started injections Friday and will have an appt Thurs to see what's happening in there! Hopefully something on the right!!


Friday, November 13, 2009

Happy Friday the 13th

Don't break any mirrors, walk under ladders or cross a black cat's path today!

Supper Club was great last night but I got a migraine while I was there and had to go home. I hate that I didn't get to enjoy the company and great food!

The floor is looking GREAT! I can't wait to post a pic!

This weekend I think we're just going to hang out and enjoy the beautiful weather. Mom and Dad are driving back from NC on Saturday and will hopefully be able to stop by for a bit. I'm taking off a little early today so we should have a good, long weekend.


Thursday, November 12, 2009

Knock Knock

Guess who arrived at my house bright and early yesterday morning... Mother Nature. I had my baseline appt this morning. I only have one small cyst left over so as long as my blood work is ok I'll be starting one last round of injectables tomorrow. I should get the results this afternoon and will update you then.

Everything else is going great! The tiles are down and I think they're laying the grout today. Yay! I can't wait to have my kitchen back. My fridge is in the dining room!!

John's parents have taken quite a liking to Little Miss Lexi. I thought she may get on their nerves during the day but Mom Z has been taking her for walks so I think she's been pretty content. I know she's going to miss them so much when they leave!

I have the 3rd month of Supper Club tonight so I'm planning to go by for a little while. It's at Heather's this month and she's planning a full Thanksgiving meal! YUM!

Update - They finally called with my results. E2 was 56 and FSH was 13. FSH is a little high but my E2 is so good that it makes up for it a bit. So I start injections tomorrow. She upped my dose to 100iu because I only have three sad little antral follicles on the right but 8 antrals on the left. So I have to get a little more meds to get the right side going. Here's hoping Round 4 of injectables will finally be the month!


Monday, November 9, 2009

I almost forgot...

I got my blood results back on Friday from three weeks ago with my rheumatologist. He has downgraded me to "probable lupus" rather than a full blown diagnosis of Lupus! My body is healing itself!! Woop! Woop!

That was the good news however I still have a "moderately positive" for my anticardiolipin count (blood clotting issue). Even with the baby aspirin I'm taking every day. I think this means I'll definitely have to see a hematoligist now. Booo. I'm pretty sure it just means I'll have to take Lovenox injections (blood thinner) every day I'm pregnant until I give birth! That's A LOT of injections! But the downgrade of my Lupus diagnosis outweighs this little bit of bad news by a ton! I know my family and friends have been praying about my lupus for years and now it seems that God may be healing me. Maybe He wanted to work on that miracle before He could start working on my baby miracle.

Happy Monday!

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Good Times

This weekend has been really nice. John's parents got here Saturday afternoon and if you haven't heard.... Alabama beat LSU!!! Roll Tide!!

I was surprised with some sweet bread and cookies when they got here! Yum! Mom Z knows I love my sweets! They also brought us a bottle of Grey Goose from the Duty Free... always a great gift. Tonight we had pork tenderloin, veggies and potatoes followed by cookies. I can tell I will be 5 lbs heavier by the time they leave. Right now Tristan and her Yia Yia are snuggling on the couch and John and his Dad are working on the kitchen floor. Hopefully they'll be done by the weekend.

I took a test today in case I beat the 1% odds but of course it was negative. I know I only ovulated on the left side and my lining was too thin but I had to check just in case. Relaxing didn't make a baby this month but it was nice not to be hopped up on hormones all month. I should start injections again sometime next week as long as my cysts are gone. Two more girls from my soulcysters got pregnant this month so hopefully I'll be close behind!


Thursday, November 5, 2009


Last night John started tearing out the kitchen floor! YIKES! It's a total mess right now and I'm sure will only get worse! BUT - we should have a new kitchen floor by the time Mom and Dad Z leave. I'll post pics when it's done! While that was going on I hung some artwork over the bed in the guest bedroom. I was quite challenged with what I should do to this room. It's purple! Light purple on top and a darker purple at the bottom to be exact. Our house consists of warm colors... browns, reds, gold. But I obviously can't decorate this room in those colors. We don't want to paint the room because it will be the baby's room at some point. We'll want to paint it depending on the gender of the child we conceive. So we don't want to paint it now and paint it again. For now it will remain purple...

2 days until they arrive!!


Monday, November 2, 2009

Doctors, Doctors and more Doctors

John and I had an appt this morning to talk with Dr. Honea about IVF. We decided to try one more month of injectables and then go for IVF in December/January. Yikes! It's official! She did an ultrasound while I was there because my left side is still hurting. I have two cysts at 2.5cm and 2.3cm respectively. Hence the pain. There was nothing on the right so that means when I ovulated a few days ago it was definitely on the left. Boo! So much for my rest cycle miracle baby! I also had a lot of fluid around the left ovary again which means that at least one of the cyst has ruptured. Hopefully when I go back for my baseline in two weeks I will be cyst free and we can try one more medicated cycle. But if the cysts are still there I will have to take birth control pills to get rid of them. :(

While we were talking with Dr. Honea she asked me what my hematologist thinks of my blood clotting issue. I told her that I've never seen a hematologist so she gave me a doctor and said that I definitely need to go see him. Then she asked me about my migraines. She asked what my last MRI showed and I told her that I didn't get one b/c every time I tell a doctor I'm TTC they say to come back after I've had the baby. SO - she gave me the name to another doctor and told me to go see him and tell him that I'm taking a break so he'll do the scan. Then she gave me the name to an ENT who gives her a mouth rinse for ulcers and said that I should go see him to get this prescription. THEN - she said she wanted me to go see the high risk OB before I actually get pregnant and gave me a few names. REALLY! FOUR new doctors!!! Are you kidding me?!? Who has time for all of that? I'm exhausted just thinking about it!

Brighter note: Only 5 days until Mom and Dad Z arrive! YAY!


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