To all of my fellow infertiles out there, I have not forgotten you. Even though I have a wonderful son who I wouldn't trade for the world; I still have a slight ache. An ache that I don't think will ever fully go away. I have longed to carry a child for as long as I can remember. But if I could do it all over again I wouldn't change a thing. If all of the events of my life hadn't fallen into the exact, perfect order I wouldn't have Christian. And if there is one thing I know, it is that Christian was meant to be my son.
The ache was triggered today when a co-worker started talking about one of his family members. His words stung, "I wish she would just hurry up and get pregnant already! I'm tired of hearing about it." I just stood there for a few seconds staring at him. I know the girl he was referring to and they have been trying for over 2 years. He finally realized what he said and immediately apologized. I told him that as tired as he is of hearing about it that I'm sure she's a million times more tired of thinking, talking, praying and hoping about it! That she wishes she could "get pregnant already!" I think he forgot that I am an infertile. He knows my story but because I am now a mother he assumed that all of my sadness had dissappeared. While it has dulled, it will never be fully gone. I will always be an infertile. I am ok with that. I don't cry myself to sleep at night. I have a full life and almost everything I have ever wanted. I am blessed beyond belief and thank God every day!
Here are some pictures of my sweet man:
|Brushing his teeth|
|Trying to ride his doggie|