Friday, January 25, 2013

Once an infertile...

Always an infertile.

To all of my fellow infertiles out there, I have not forgotten you.  Even though I have a wonderful son who I wouldn't trade for the world; I still have a slight ache.  An ache that I don't think will ever fully go away.  I have longed to carry a child for as long as I can remember.  But if I could do it all over again I wouldn't change a thing.  If all of the events of my life hadn't fallen into the exact, perfect order I wouldn't have Christian.  And if there is one thing I know, it is that Christian was meant to be my son. 

The ache was triggered today when a co-worker started talking about one of his family members.  His words stung, "I wish she would just hurry up and get pregnant already!  I'm tired of hearing about it."  I just stood there for a few seconds staring at him. I know the girl he was referring to and they have been trying for over 2 years. He finally realized what he said and immediately apologized.  I told him that as tired as he is of hearing about it that I'm sure she's a million times more tired of thinking, talking, praying and hoping about it!  That she wishes she could "get pregnant already!" I think he forgot that I am an infertile.  He knows my story but because I am now a mother he assumed that all of my sadness had dissappeared.  While it has dulled, it will never be fully gone.  I will always be an infertile.  I am ok with that.  I don't cry myself to sleep at night.  I have a full life and almost everything I have ever wanted.  I am blessed beyond belief and thank God every day!

Here are some pictures of my sweet man:

After bath

Brushing his teeth

Trying to ride his doggie
xxoo

3 comments:

  1. I am so behind on my blogging. I love you and am so blessed to have you in my life.

    ReplyDelete
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