Friday, November 29, 2013


We had a great Thanksgiving filled with love and laughter.  I am so blessed... well beyond what I deserve. 

With Granna and Pop

Sweetest boy

C has had a cold since Saturday.  Poor bud.  We went down to Pensacola to watch Tristan play softball.  (She hit a homerun!!)  It was super cold and windy so we didn't even go to the beach.  It was a bummer to drive all the way down there and not even step foot on the beach.  But it was great to see Tristan doing so well.  C's colds are tough though.  He hasn't had a stomach virus but a cold is just as bad.  He coughs so hard he throws up.  So he's snotty, crabby, doesn't sleep well, he gets bad diapers from the antibiotics (he also has an ear infection) and he throws up a lot.  It's the perfect storm of illness.  He seems to be feeling a little better today.

Today I tuned into the Christmas music while I was out shopping with C.  I heard the song that always makes me cry the first time I hear it.  It used to make me cry because I was longing for a child.  Now it makes me cry because I have that child!  So thankful!!

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas
Is you


Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Eating my words

***Mom - you'll want to get Julie to read this one.

I've learned many things since I have become a mother.  I've discovered feelings and emotions that I didn't even know existed.  I now also know how annoying it is for other people to give you unsolicited advice on how to raise your child.  So I should offer my sister an apology for the times I shook my finger in judgement.  Mom's are just doing the best they can.  I know that now.

It was so easy for me to say, "You shouldn't be sleeping in the bed with him" or "just let him cry."  At the time that all made perfect sense.  But now, when he's crying at night and begging for his mommy, I want nothing more than to run in there and curl up with him for the night.  Every thing that could possibly be wrong runs through my mind.  Is he hot, cold, thirsty, or hungry?  Does he have a dirty diaper or a tummy ache?  Did he have a bad dream?  If I was there beside him I would know.  We're wired as mothers to protect our children.  Up until a few hundred years ago mothers always slept with their babies to keep them warm and protect them from danger.  It's a fairly recent notion that we should sleep separately. So my instincts scream at me to go to my baby.  But my logical mind (and John) bring me back to what we need to do to keep sanity in our house.  C had gotten into a routine of waking up every night at midnight.  It was very rare that he slept the whole night.  So... several months ago John let C cry it out.  I say John because I had to sleep in a separate room with the door shut and some loud white noise.  I couldn't hear him begging and crying for me.  John said he cried for over an hour the first night.  It was 45 min the second night and 30 minutes the third.  After that he has been fairly consistent with sleeping through the night.  At bedtime I still rock him until he gets sleepy.  He puts his sweet little hands together and we say our prayers. Then I stop rocking and hold him until he falls asleep.  75% of the time he wakes up when I place him in the crib and then he cries for about 5-10 minutes.  I hope that stops soon.

Apart from the crying at night he is a super happy toddler.  He rarely ever cries.  If he does it's because he's really hurt, really tired, or REALLY wants a cookie.  But most of the time he's a bubbly little thing.  He loves to climb up on the furniture, jump off and then cackle with laughter.  He also loves to be chased and play hide and seek.

Sweet boy

Saturday, November 16, 2013


Until recently, Christian's vocabulary has been pretty limited.  The doctor said it's normal for a child to develop either physical skills or language skills quickly but then lag on the other.  C definitely developed his physical skills quickly so we have been patiently waiting on the talking.  The past two weeks have been astounding!  I picked him up from school one day this week and his teacher commented on it.  She said, "He was barely talking two weeks ago and today he said a full sentence."  He said, "Crosby went tee tee in the potty. Yay!"  That's a pretty long sentence for a kid who was barely talking a few weeks ago.  While I was watching a football game tonight I gasped and said "Unbelievable!"  He gasped and said "Umbeavable!"  Haha.  He's so stinking cute!  He will now typically try to say a word if I ask him to say it.  Occasionally I'll say, Can you say xyz?" and he'll say, "Yeah."  I don't know if he thinks he can't say it or if he's just tired of me asking him to say words or if he's really just telling me he can say it. 

Speaking of tee teeing in the potty.... He's doing ok with it.  He's no longer dry in the mornings when he wakes up so we're not putting him on the potty then.  I'll ask him when I'm changing his diaper if he wants to go and he says, "No."  So I'm not pushing it.  He's still pretty far away from being two.  It's super early to be trying to force him to go.  They put him on the potty every two hours at school but he rarely goes.  The only time he consistently goes in the potty is right before bath.  The whole time he's saying, "Choc! Choc!".. for chocolate.  He will now look at me and say tee tee or poo poo while pointing at his diaper.  So he knows when he's going which is big step. 

John was off on Monday so he took C and Tristan to the park for some pictures.  I was trying to get him to get a shot for the Christmas card.  We'll see if one makes the cut.  C really wasn't into it.

Christian got his first kiss.  This little girl walked right up and planted one on him.


Sunday, November 10, 2013


I started this blog for three reasons:
1. To update friends and family without having to talk about it.  I'm very open and fine with the family knowing all about our lives but I don't like to physically speak about our issues.  So this was a way to keep everyone informed without having to talk about it.
2.  As a record of what all we went through to get this miracle.  A dear reader made a comment reminding me of a post that I wrote two years ago.  I go back and read old posts all of the time.  When I'm tired or Christian is having a terrible twos moment I'll read an old post to remind me how much harder it used to be...  How empty I felt and the longing I had in my heart. It's a nice reminder of answered prayers.
3.  As a resource for other fertility challenged ladies.  I didn't know anyone other than my sister who had a hard time getting pregnant.   She was great but I had a lot of issues that she didn't have.  So I did a lot of research over my 4 1/2 years of trying.  Most of the information I found included studies and doctor speak.  I wanted to know what other women were experiencing but I couldn't find a lot of that kind of stuff at the time.  I think there's more of it now.  For example, I tried to find a picture of a bruise caused by a progesterone shot but I couldn't find anything.  Now there is one out there because I posted it!

As an added bonus it is an AWESOME way of documenting Christian's life.  When he is older he'll be able to read back through the posts and see how cute, sweet and loved he was!

House update: They are really coming along on the new house!  YAY!

John went to Georgia for the weekend to watch Tristan's tournament so Christian and I headed down to my parents for the day on Saturday.  This is one rare moment where C sat still.  He crawled up in the chair with my mom and got a cuddle.

Another dear reader asked if I would post a link to her story.  She was diagnosed with mesothelioma right after giving birth.  She beat cancer and is now raising awareness.  My dad was exposed to asbestos while working in a factory so I hope that he doesn't develop this horrible cancer.

Heather's video


Sunday, November 3, 2013

Guess Who Got a Haircut!

This guy!  We took him last Saturday for his first haircut.  He did really well! He only a cried a little right the end when she was cutting around his ears.

Yesterday we took C to the wooden train and on a short hike down the trail.  It was such a beautiful day!
Mommy with a sweet boy!

Look at that sweet face!


Family shot

Throwing leaves in the water.

Making his Dad proud

Crazy hair.
He was batman for Halloween

Ridin' the streets


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